The Friends Who Hold You Together When Everything Feels Heavy

If you’ve been following since the first of the year, you already know it’s been a lot.

We’ve been blessed and stressed at the same time. We moved. We rebuilt. We set boundaries. We navigated tension. And somewhere in all of that chaos, I’ve been thinking about the friends who hold you together when your life feels like it’s constantly shifting.

Because I would not have survived this past year without mine.

The One Who Came and Got Me

My oldest friend lives in South Carolina now, but our story started when I was nineteen.

I was working for Waffle House, INC. with her brother. I was fresh out on my own and living in a situation that was not safe or healthy. Some nights, instead of going “home,” I slept at the low bar counter at work after my shift ended.

Her brother called her. He told her about me and my situation. Then, she and her husband drove four hours to come get me without having ever met me. Four hours. They moved me into their home without hesitation.

That was the beginning.

Since then, she has rescued me more than once. I have lived with her in Oregon, South Carolina, and North Carolina. I’ve watched her kids grow up, get married, and have kids of their own. She watched me have babies. She sat with me when one of them passed away. She has seen every version of me.

I love her more than I can put into words and I miss her constantly.

She is one of the friends who hold you together when you’re too exhausted to hold yourself.

The One I’ve Never Met

Then there’s my Connecticut bestie. We have never met in person. And yet, she knows me better than most people who have physically stood in the same room as me.

I met her over eleven years ago when I first started streaming. She has been my Twitch mod that entire time. We talk on the phone at least twice a week. We text constantly. We vent. We strategize. We encourage. We reality check each other.

We are alike in so many ways, but in our relationships, our roles are reversed. We joke about that a lot. Somehow we are walking through almost identical life challenges at the same time.

We have code words and a system. We know when the other needs advice and when the other just needs to scream into the void.

And to anyone who says online friendships are not real? Please…

She is absolutely one of the friends who hold you together. Geography does not determine depth.

One day, I hope we finally meet in person. Right now, neither of us can afford that kind of trip. But when it happens, I know it will feel like we’ve known each other for lifetimes.

Because we have.

The One Who Shows Up Every Day Without Fail

And then there’s my guy bestie in Georgia.

We met in 2012 after I moved there following the loss of one of my children. My mom convinced me to join her dart league team. We often played against his team. We went to blind draw tournaments on Fridays. Sometimes we even ended up as partners.

From there, it just stuck.

We text every single day. No exaggeration. We game “together” but separately, because I prefer solo play. He respects that. We will be on the same game at the same time, talking about it, but doing our own thing.

He has been there for me emotionally, financially when I needed it, and mentally when I spiraled. Even quietly when I just needed someone steady.

He is also one of the friends who hold you together when the world feels unpredictable.

Gratitude in the Middle of Chaos

I love these three humans with my whole heart. Two of them I have known in person for years. One I have never hugged. And yet the impact is equal.

Yesterday was also the first day since we moved that neither one of us heard from or saw my partner’s mom. The house was quiet; the mood was lighter; there was no tension hanging in the air.

It was just us.

And in that quiet, I felt overwhelming gratitude. Not just for the peace in the house, but for the fact that no matter how heavy life gets, I have the friends who hold you together standing in the background, ready to catch me if I fall.

That kind of love is rare. And I do NOT take it for granted.

Question:

Who are the friends who have quietly held you together during your hardest seasons?